Monday, July 19, 2010

Requirements of a ‘Desi Dulha’

I bet while reading the title, some girls recollected on their old memoirs, some anticipated on their current situation and some fretting about the future dramas. This is more like a ‘kahani har ghar ki’. At one point in life, every girl goes through this phase. The minute a girl blows twenty two candles and shows off a huge smile on her birthday, her parents start to frown. Their mind starts recalling all the langotiya yaar’s and their sons followed by the age and the profession. Can’t say about other things, however, in our desi culture, a girl’s age spreads like a fire in the jungle. All the aunty’s start to look at you differently in parties/mandir/gurudwara. Random photographs of random guys lying in the living room or your inbox. A regular house turns into a production house of Karan Johar.

But wait; in this entire film making process…oops, I meant Jodi making process; how does a girl communicates her requirements to her father? Every girl has an illusion of her ‘andekha anjaana’. Few elements are highly required in any marriage-material type of guy. First and foremost, he should be decent looking. Com’on guys, we all know that the least one can ask for is ‘a presentable person’. We, girls, know exactly how we look so we don’t dream of a John Abraham or Hrithik Roshan, unless we are talking about some snobby, Richie-rich, daddy’s girl. Second requirement is the education. It’s vital to have a good education. In fact, he should be adept to the new technology. Should be able to carry a good conversation with the wife. Should be one step ahead or on the same level with his partner. Speaking on behalf of other girls, at times it feels good to discover that your partner is so intelligent. By the way, it’s okay if he’s not smarter than a fifth grader…

Third is definitely the family. We can act sophisticated or stuck up as much as we want among our friends or at work but the minute you step in the house, it should be a homely feeling. It’s a pleasurable encounter to find yourself surrounded by people who care. Also, where else would you brandish the gorgeous sari’s and heavy jewels you get in your wedding? Wink wink… Fourth requirement would be ‘a loving and romantic guy’. Which gal does not like to be loved? Or given a red-rose on a first date? Or liked to be held closely? Yeah, now the article is sounding a bit cliché, right? Call me cynical, but frankly speaking, these old customs are still very much in fashion. A red rose is just perfect on a date followed by a nice dinner and a walk holding hands. Sending archies cards, calling at an unexpected hour, hearing the three words in the middle of a conversation. All these are A-OK qualities of a romantic partner.

Just for the record, these four qualities do not embody four different guys. All these factors should be commingled in a single person. Only then we will be able to sing ‘Dulha mil gaya, Dulha mil gaya’…


  1. Did you come across any such guy?

  2. i wonder how you version of 'requirement of desi dulhan' would look like. can you write an article about what women think guys want from women and what they should want.



Have we ever tried to understand that only an expectation leads us to disappointment? Why is it so difficult to not expect anything from thi...